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Showing posts with label sarcasm. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sarcasm. Show all posts

Friday, September 18, 2009

Chairman Obamao's Little Red Book


The rank condescension, treating us all like children, is what I find most galling about the Obama Administration in particular, and liberals in general.

And then there are the brainwashed masses...

* The hosanna shouting Hopium Smokers in the press;

* The intellectually, morally and financially bankrupt congressional politburo writing important laws restricting the capacity of flush toilets while continuing to worm their way into every corner of our lives;

* And those servants of the Ministry of Culture and Propaganda, the Hollywood celebutards pledging their pathetic, plastic lives to Obama.



They lecture on on things even a moron knows, and act as though they just thought it up themselves

We didn't know how to wash our hands before The Great O entered our lives!

We thank Minister of Hygiene Sebelius for teaching the masses how to cough.

Our children cared nothing for school until the dear leader imparted his words of wisdom and encouragement to them. "Get serious, work hard, sit up straight..."

Wow! What wisdom! How did we ever educate our young before The Big O rolled into our lives?

When they're not pronouncing the patently obvious as though they were Moses descending from Mount Sinai with The Tablets, they spout absurdities:

Expanded health care for all, and it won't add one dime of debt!

Terrorists attacked us from Canada

"Spend our way to prosperity" is my personal favorite. Right up there with Eat Yourself Thin. And if you disagree with The Big O-genda, you're a racist!!!

Enough Already! Shut Up! STFU! I'm tired of your lectures! And so is everybody else who isn't a mushy-headed libtard! So just shut up and leave us alone. Mankind survived before you got here and it will continue once you're gone.


Even Bill Maher (who I grudgingly respect when I'm not wanting to punch that smirk off his face), is fed up:
New Rule: Now that we've answered his call to wash our hands, President Obama must continue to tell us how to live. Last week, when America was faced with the pan-global swine flu omega death plague, the President went on TV and told people to wash their hands, and experts tell us this made a big difference, which augurs well for next month's "National Wipe Your Butt Day." Next week, in a fireside chat, he'll tell us not to put a fork in the toaster.
Maher better watch it. He may find himself on the enemies list next to Glenn Beck and Rush Limbaugh. As for me, I agree with Reverend Gregori: No thanks. I've already got a Messiah.

Janet Napoleon courtesy of Chicago Ray

Chairman Obamao: http://www.lifeisajoke.com/pictures1108.htm

Thursday, September 3, 2009

European Unemployment: A Modest Proposal

Dispatch from Malaisistan: Is war the answer?

Foreign Policy has a good piece on rampant unemployment among Europe's young college graduates. The author calls them The New Lost Generation.
This year's graduating class is running smack into the worst employment market in decades -- a situation that threatens long-term social and economic trauma.

Although unemployment is high and rising across all demographic groups, Europe's young workers have been especially hard hit.
The economic consequences are obvious: Young adults living at home, afraid to start a family and unable to engage in the warp and woof of their nation. There are also social consequences:
The effects aren't simply financial. One prominent British think-tanker recently warned, "If this situation persists, the risk may be of a new generation lacking the experience, qualifications, and self-belief to provide for themselves and their families."
The old Lost Generation consisted of those worn out by the collapse of idealism that WWI represented. The senseless slaughter left its mark on Hemingway and his contemporaries.

Nowadays, European youth are cut to the quick by the senseless senselessness of believing in nothing while criticizing everything. Eastern European newcomers doing the jobs Western Europeans just won't do while Muslims nibble away at the fabric of their once liberal societies. God has returned to the continent, but he's angry, vengeful and straight out of the 7th Century.
America remains a hyperpower...

Perhaps European unemployment is a natural consequence of too much taxation, regulation, immigration? But nobody wants to go there.

So What's The Solution?

Glorious Militarism! War is the answer. Enlist those young folks, build up armies and navies and go conquer the benighted lands that are causing the world so much trouble. Yes, another crusade! Only this time, not for the Pope and Christianity, but rather for classical liberalism.

We need a new crusade, a reconquista of Classical Liberal values, and these aimless Europeans raised on Sartre's absurdities are just the ones to do it!

A new crusade: For beer, women drivers, Pork bratwurst, bikinis and agnosticism. Sink those pirates ships! Those that don't die in the fusillade can swim to shore if the sharks don't get them!

Take up the white man's burden! For hashish cafes, prostitution, blasphemy, strip bars and the sneering morality of no morals! Blast those illiberal terrorist hideouts!

I've often said you can't kill 'em all. But history has shown that you can kill enough of them to where they're no longer a problem. And you can grab some glory and maybe rescue your civilization in the process.

Or you could just cling to the fag end of a clapped out culture and hitch your self esteem to a football club...


Foreign Policy-Europe's New Lost Generation