G8 Addresses Global Warming & Other Fairy Tales

International Organizations = Global Incompetence

L'AQUILA, Italy (AP) - President Barack Obama and other leaders at the Group of Eight summit have struck a new agreement on fighting global warming.

Consider the ridiculousness of this statement by our president:

“We have agreed for the first time that average global temperatures must rise by no more than 2C."

This is folly. Why not demand the wind stop blowing? It spreads air pollution around and messes up women's hair-dos. Why don't they just have Obama rebuke the global atmosphere? "Peace, be still!" No, wait. That was Jesus calming the seas...

Santa Claus and Witches are Next
The gathering also targeted tax criminals such as Santa Claus, who undercuts local businesses and pays no political contributions or taxes. He's also an environmental offender, spewing reindeer flatulence, which the G8 recently declared a greenhouse gas. The bearded offender is known as Pere Noel in France, Cinter Klaas in Holland, Der Weinachtsmann in Germany and El Navideno on the Iberian Peninsula.

The G8 midgets also agreed to scour European forests for the big bad wolf and and the witch who menaced Hansel und Gretel. The latter should be easy since she is rumored to live in a gingerbread house and has developed a taste for oven-roasted children.

Last year we discovered that Bush was Batman, but so far, the secret is still safe that Barack Obama is Robin Hood.



AP - G8 Follies

Times Online - Climate Fantasies

Chicago Ray