Satan's Bagpipes

The Democratic party plays the press like Satan playing his bagpipes

Germans call Bagpipes a "Tootlesack." That struck me as quite comical when I first heard it from a drunken crowd of German Soldiers I was careening around with down Europe's cobblestone streets. The Scotsman who blew pipes for his British Army unit didn't like it too well though. It looked for a minute like there was fixin' to be a Queen's Own -vs- Bundeswehr throwdown. It all worked out OK because the English-speaking Germans couldn't cut through the angry piper's insults, which were wrapped heavily in a whiskey-soused burr. My Deutsches Freunden couldn't understand the whole bagpipe appreciation thing either. They hated the sound.

Bagpipe music: You either love it or hate it. To aficionados, it is an eerily haunting transport to windswept highlands and a bracing, courage-boosting call to battle. To detractors, it is a discordant clash of wheezes, snorts, and growls, with a bagful of tortured cats thrown in. One of my favorite Beverly Hillbillies moments was when Grannie grabbed her broom and set upon a man playing the bagpipes because she thought he was being attacked by a noisy monster.

The press is the Devil's bagpipes: A discordant hot air powered wailing of multifarious tones and squealings that somehow arrive at an evil, liberal harmony.

When the Democrats crank up Satan's Bagpipes, it feels like we conservatives are being attacked by a noisy monster. Meanwhile, liberals are happily dancing and singing along to the tune. It's their fighting song. It hearkens back to a time when we were all liberal and poor in FDR's America, where men were paid pennies to lean on shovels all day and the Feral Government controlled everything. Bankers were jumping out of windows and the Robber Barons who built our great railways were finally brought low by the great depression.

Why the Devil's Bagpipes? Because Muslims, Christians and Jews all know that Satan cannot create anything; he can only desecrate and pervert what God has created. And he can only do that with human cooperation. If that doesn't describe the press I don't know what does.

The press treats religion derisively, if at all, and believers are portrayed as superstitious buffoons. The only "Religious" people treated respectfully are those promoting gay marriage and other clearly anti-biblical ideas. Hollywood celebutard pronouncements are given the respect due to Moses descending from Mount Sinai.

Our stinking press can't even report basic facts without mischaracterizing them or adding their own little editorial comments. They can't help it: Most reporters have no real-world expertise. They earn a journalism degree and start reporting. Reporters of old at least started from an honest profession and some real-world knowledge that didn't come from radical Marxist professors.

So, am I saying the Democratic party is Satan? No. But The Prince of Darkness is more than happy to blow his pipes for them. So is the press evil? No. Like most of Satan's tools, they are clueless dupes who think they are doing good.

Where's Granny with her broom when we need her?

* Yes, this is a reprint of an October 08 post